we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
