Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
being pregnant is like rehab
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
