is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
