I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Randomize
