He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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