It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize
