You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
