Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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