Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Randomize
