Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
