she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
