Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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