So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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