When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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