question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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