The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
