Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
