at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
