I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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