Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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