Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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