I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize