Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
17 year olds will be the death of me.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
