i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Randomize