she smelled like a LAN party
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
