i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
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