whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize