It's Friday. Sex?
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Randomize
