hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
