If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
