Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Girls should come with a carfax report
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
My feet surprised me
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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