i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
