I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
