Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
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