I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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