You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
