I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
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