The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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