Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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