He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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