Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
How external is "for external use only"?
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
