yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
