all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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