he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize