laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize