the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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