im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
