Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
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