Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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