What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize
